Chapter 1: An Afternoon at the Café
The café was bathed in a soft, lazy light, just like the loose waves of her hair and her drowsy, drooping eyes. Xuanxuan sat by the window with a menu in hand, her gaze drifting toward the entrance every so often. She wasn’t really hoping for anything from this blind date. It was just something her elders had arranged—like brushing off a layer of dust from some forgotten corner of life. But her mind was still caught in the morning. That morning, she had visited a new psychological clinic for the first time. “I think... I might have a problem.” She had hesitated for quite a while before speaking. The man across from her had black-rimmed glasses and a surgical mask covering half his face. He looked calm, more like a quiet schoolteacher than a psychiatrist. "You can tell me more." His tone was mild, and that put her a little more at ease. She lowered her eyes and twisted the hem of her shirt. After a few seconds of silence, she spoke. “I like... being hit in the stomach.” The room fell into a brief silence. But he didn’t frown. He didn’t sneer. He didn’t even show surprise. He simply asked, “How long have you felt this way?” She blinked. “Since I was a teenager, I guess. It started with accidents—being elbowed or hit during PE. At first I thought I hated it, but later I realized... I was actually waiting for it.” "Has this preference affected your daily life?" "Not really. I go to work, live like anyone else. I just... secretly joined a boxing gym." He wrote something down. "As long as you're not hurting yourself or others, this is not inherently a disorder. We can explore it further, but I want you to know—it's okay." That simple sentence made her chest clench tight and warm. She had never been told “it’s okay” before. Never. Not even once. They talked for almost an hour. When she walked out of the clinic, the sky was clear, and her steps felt lighter. She had no idea that the man she just poured her heart out to was the same one scheduled to meet her for that blind date in the afternoon. In fact, she didn’t even recognize him when he entered the café. He had taken off the mask, styled his hair differently, and was wearing a casual beige sweater. Soft-spoken and restrained, he looked entirely different from the doctor she had seen just hours earlier. He, on the other hand, recognized her at first glance. But he said nothing. “Hi, I’m Cheng Yi,” he introduced himself. She offered a polite smile. “Xuanxuan.” They sat down and began to talk. Surprisingly, the conversation flowed easily. No one mentioned the clinic. No one needed to. Cheng Yi sat across from her, watching her carefully. The way she picked up the coffee cup with both hands. The way she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear before speaking. The small, anxious pauses between her words. He realized—he didn’t want to scare her with recognition. He wanted to understand her more. Slowly. That afternoon, as the warm light shifted across the table and their drinks cooled, he made a quiet decision. He would get closer to her. Even if it meant starting from scratch.
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